Squarespace

To all of you who followed along with me as I got my start in the blogging world, I’ve just now realized that none of you can tell that I am, in fact, still blogging. I switched my platform over to Squarespace about a year ago. I thought it was strange that I never saw your comments any more, and that my readership tanked. Well, I clearly knew nothing and didn’t realize the impact switching from the WordPress community would have. I miss you all and the community very deeply. I do, however, love the ease and look of Squarespace and have been told by several developer/code friends to stay there.

I’m still at burgersinmycakehole.com chugging along with my weight loss goals. I just bought a house! Crazy stuff and none of my WordPress friends have even noticed my posts because I’M A DERP. This is my apology. It sucks, I know. I miss you all. I’m going to go through my followers and be sure to subscribe to each of you so I don’t miss anything!

❤

Sweet Potato Chorizo Hash

Hash, man.

I’m devouring this as we speak. I’m speechless. Never, in a million years, could you convince me ANYTHING tastes better at home. I’m a “go out” kind of girl. But this. My hash at home > hip brunch places. And brunch for dinner? Let’s pretend it’s Saturday morning. Always. Why the hell not.

Also, Mike isn’t a fan of eggs. I KNOW, RIGHT!? And he INHALED two servings of this bad boy. Dreeeeeamy.

Hash, mannnnn.

You will need:
3 small sweet potatoes (or 2 large)
1/2 pound chorizo
3-4 eggs
1/2 yellow onion, diced
1 tsp minced garlic
2 tablespoons olive oil, divided
1 pinch salt
Pico, hot sauce and avocado for toppings

Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees.

Roughly chop sweet potatoes until they’re whatever size you prefer. Put them in a big bowl, or a large ziploc bag. Add one tablespoon of olive oil to and a pinch of salt and shake up, coating all of the sweet potato pieces in olive oil.

Place sweet potatoes on a baking sheet, spread as evenly as possible. Bake for 30 minutes.

When the potatoes have about 5 minutes left, take your oven proof skillet (cast iron) and put it over medium-high (6-7 on dial) heat with the other tablespoon of olive oil. Add your teaspoon of minced garlic. Add chopped onion and chorizo. Cook until chorizo is all nice and browned. About 5-7 minutes. Stir in potatoes. LEAVE OVEN ON. Once all mixed, scoot some of the mix around with a large wooden spoon to make little holes for your eggs. Crack your eggs directly into the holes in the pan. Pull off of the heat and place skillet in the oven. Bake until eggs are set, or about 5-7 minutes.

Take it out. Freak out. Be proud. You are a cooking God. Aw yeah.

Top with pico, avocado and hot sauce. Nom. Now. For real. Stop. Wasting. Time. Oh, and $15 a weekend at that cool hipster brunch spot.

*Side note: these can be made vegetarian with soyrizo or whatever it’s called. This is also insanely healthy. I’m not an expert but I feel like this meets the requirements of primal, paleo and several other diets. So, eat without guilt, yall.

Coconut Chicken

Look at me being all healthy.

But seriously, this is probably the healthiest thing I’ve eaten in weeks.

To say I love coconut shrimp is the perfect definition of an understatement. I could live on it. And who doesn’t love chicken? Oh, why not cross over the coconut shrimp idea to chicken? Okay. I will. And I did. And it is magnificent. And not only is it delicious, it is also paleo, primal, caveman, gluten free, clean eating, voodoo, witch doctor approved! My eyebrow is already growing together as one…

This is an easy weeknight dinner that I assure you, everyone will approve of. And your gut will thank you for not feeding it complete crap.

I’m back bitches.

You will need:
6 thawed chicken tenderloins (or equivalent to a pound)
2 eggs
1/2 cup of unsweetened almond milk
1/2 cup of almond flour
1 cup of unsweetened coconut
Coconut (or your favorite) cooking spray

Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees.

Gather two bowls. Put your sprayed baking sheet next to them. In one bowl, add your eggs and almond milk. Whisk well. In the other bowl, combine the almond flour and coconut, mix it up well.

One tenderloin at a time, dip it in the egg wash. Let it drip off a few times. Lay chicken tender in the dry mix. Flip it over a few times to get it nice and coated. Lay tender on greased baking sheet. Repeat until all tenders are ready to go!

Bake for about 15 minutes. (Ours took exactly 15.)

Turn broiler on low and let them sit under it for about 2 minutes. Watch carefully so they don’t burn.

Aren’t they beautiful? My love for chicken tenders is real and deep. I’m that kid who got chicken fingers at Mexican and Japanese restaurants until my buds matured. You could say I’m a chicken finger connoisseur. While trying to lose weight, it’s kind of impossible to eat traditional tenders and see results. So, I am beside myself happy at how delicious and crispy these babies are. Cheat clean? Isn’t that a thing? Oh yes. I’m obsessed with ketchup but please, get creative with your dipping sauce. I’m boring. Enjoy!

Rosemary Chicken and Dumplins

I once met someone who told me they had never had chicken and dumplins. That person is no longer with us. They died from lack of joy in their life. WHOA. It got dark in here. But that’s how serious chicken and dumplins are to me. And it’s not dumplings. It’s dumplins. This is Kentucky. Ing doesn’t exist on MOST words.

Not everybody is a “homemaker” like grandma, so this recipe calls for pre-made biscuit dough. Grandma, my dumplins will never touch yours, but even you said they were amazing. So sue me for not slaving away at dough and using frozen veggies.

These dumplins come without cream of mystery soup. And there’s not a lot of work involved. I wouldn’t call this the healthiest dish. But, I once ate this for a week straight and lost a few pounds. Just sayin.

The rosemary in this dish is KILLER. And aside from the DUMPLINS, it is the star of this dish. Like, please do not try any other kind of seasoning in place of it. Just trust me. Let’s get it on.

You will need:

-1 whole rotisserie chicken (because this was meant to be a quick dinner. 4 cooked and shredded chicken breasts will do, if you’re wanting to be a hero)
-1 bag frozen chopped carrots
-1 bag frozen peas
-one chopped yellow onion
-1.5 boxes of chicken broth
-1 cup of milk (your choice!)
-1 can of flaky biscuits
-1 tablespoon of salt
-1 teaspoon of black pepper
-1 teaspoon of thyme
-1 entire sprig of fresh rosemary, chopped

Pour all of the chicken broth and milk into a big pot. Heat it on high until boiling. Add in frozen veggies and chopped onion. Then add all spices. Turn heat down to medium. (6-7 on dial)

While veggies are cooking, shred rotisserie chicken, adding in as you go. Cook for about 10 minutes. It should be lightly boiling at this point.

While chicken and veggies cook in the stock, cut biscuits one at a time in 6 pieces.

After about 10-15 minutes of the veggies and chicken cooking in the stock, add in biscuit balls all at once. Cook all together for about 20 minutes or until dumplins are finished! Stir every 5 minutes or so.

From start to finish, you have a delicious, hearty, home cooked meal in about 30 minutes! You truly can not beat that. I make this often and it always gets rave reviews. It’s perfect for just about everything, including leftover lunches! The rosemary gives it a perfect flavor.

With all do respect grandma, I win at the chicken and dumplins game. BAM. Love youuuu.

Enjoy guys!

Brown Rice Mexi-Bake

My friends.

I swear I’m useless from the week of Thanksgiving until Christmas. I just want to eat all of the foods and cookies. But hey, I’m just trying to add a few layers of fat to keep me warm this winter. Oh, I already have a few layers of fat? Cue cricket sounds.

Quick side note. Today, my building had a false alarm fire. So we had a fire drill. No big deal, right? Well, it is. It’s a huge deal. We are on the 36th floor. (Which is actually more like 40th if you count the double floor utility areas.) And we have to walk down the stairs. MILLIONS OF STAIRS. Now, anyone who knows me knows going up stairs is my arch nemesis. But I thought, hell, I’m just walking down them, who cares. I put on my heavy peacoat and trotted happily on down the stairs. After a bit, my thighs started to burn. Then a little longer and my head started to spin. I started to sweat badly. I thought, oh my god, we have to be almost there. I looked up. 28 floors to go. Long story short, had this been a real situation, I would have died. It has been a huge wake up call for me. I stopped and gave up with 16 floors left.

ANYWAYS. Enough with that.

This is the first week in a month that we actually had somewhat of a plan for meals. And I couldn’t wait to make this to share with you.

I’m not going to call this healthy. But I’m also going to say there are a million worse things for you. It has a good amount of carbs, but it also has A LOT of good for you fiber, veggies, protein and no sugar! You win some, you lose some. But. But but but. It’s DELICIOUS. So, I mean, yeah. That mixed with all of the other great things I listed above, make this a no brainier decision to make for dinner RIGHT NOW. Jeez, it’s so easy too!

You will need:
1 tablespoon of olive oil
1 clove of garlic, minced
1 yellow onion
2 cups of cooked brown rice
2 cups shredded cooked chicken*
1 can black beans, drained
1 can fire roasted tomatoes, drained
1 small can of green chilies
1 packet of taco seasoning
1 cup light shredded mexican cheese
1/2 cup cheddar cheese, shredded
Cilantro, avocado and greek yogurt for toppings!

*I cooked two chicken breasts a few nights ago and shredded them with a fork for this dish. You can also use a rotisserie chicken, which I would have done if I had one!

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

In a small skillet, heat up a tablespoon of olive oil. Add in chopped yellow onion and garlic. Cook until soft. About 5 minutes.

When that is complete, take a cast iron skillet, or a baking dish of sorts, add in your cooked onions. Add all ingredients (except the cup of mexican cheese) in the skillet, stirring carefully so that they are all mixed together.

Take your cup of mexican cheese, and spread on top of your well mixed mixture.

Stick cast iron skillet of awesomeness into the oven for 12-15 minutes. Once the cheese is all melty and gooey looking, turn on low broil. Let it sit under the broiler for about 3 minutes to make the cheese look PERFECT.

Isn’t it a masterpiece? I knowwww! I tried to tell you!

I was craving a quesadilla because, well because they’re the damn perfect food, okay. So I served little easy cheese quesadillas with it. Not that we needed it. At. All. We were both in a food coma. Just how I like it. (Well, when it isn’t completely terrible for you food!) and this is good for you! COMATIZATION COMMENCE.

Healthy Breakfast Cookies

My relationship with oatmeal has been a rocky one. I was a cream of wheat kid. Just like a kid can either prefer N*SYNC or Backstreet Boys. You either liked cream of wheat or oatmeal. I loooooved cinnamon cream of wheat and Backstreet Boys. (Particularly A.J. and Kevin. I know, I’m so punk.) For reasons unbeknownst to me, people basically tried to force feed me oatmeal all of my life. Okay, they didn’t like hold me down and force me. But our house in the morning, EVERY morning, was a lot like the scene at the beginning of Home Alone, but we weren’t going on a fun family trip. We were going to school. Ick. So, because of the craziness, mom either brought a pack of pop-tarts in the car, or brushed her teeth while not even remotely cautiously mixing instant oatmeal and water. Ick. Literally, every day I’d take a bite, make a funny face, do a weird lip movement tossing it around in my mouth like a 90 year old person does, and would then throw it away. Every. Day. And every day I’d say “I HAAAAAATE oatmeal mom.” And she’d say “Well, eat it. It’s good for you.”

I promise my childhood was a happy one. Lively and never a dull moment, yes. Unhappy? No. I was just fed slop in the morning, NBD.

Slop. That’s how I referred to instant oatmeal until about a year ago. Nothing crazy about the oatmeal changed. No one added magic fairy “Morgan Likey” dust to their oatmeal packs a year ago. I think my taste buds just had a talk and were like “it’s time to grow the eff up.” 26 years late.

I constantly saw variations of this witchcraft where you combine fruits and oatmeal and bake them in cookie form and it was supposed to be good. Nothing will ever taste as good as Subway’s oatmeal cookie. So, I’m being very honest here, because that is what you come here for. I think? Eh. But it does NOT taste like a Subway oatmeal cookie. But is it yummy? Yes. It is very yummy. Imagine a granola bar that is warm, HOT AND FRESH OUT THE KITCHEN. That’s what these cookies mean to me.

 

You will need:

2 cups of whole grain oats
2 very ripe bananas
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup applesauce
1/2 cup peanut butter
1/2 cup chocolate chips
1 teaspoon of ground cinnamon
A literal pinch of baking powder
2 packets of Truvia (or a few drops of liquid stevia)

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.

Now here is the fun part. Keep in mind I am kind of weird. You mash all of this stuff together with your hands. Or you can be civil and use a fancy Kitchenaid mixer of sorts. But, I think it’s fun to use your hands and it’s almost somewhat of an arm workout. (If you’re out of shape like me. Hah) Mix until VERY well blended. You can get intense and COMPLETELY mix it down to a dough in a mixer, I’m sure.

Spoon one little bit at a time, roll it around in your hand to create some shape, and flatten it out like a cookie. Place one by one on a greased baking sheet. Bake on 350 for 16-20 minutes.

My batch made 14 small cookies. They last about a week in an airtight container, so Mike and I ate two small cookies each morning.

These will definitely become a regular in our house. And I am SO glad oatmeal and I put our differences behind us so I can eat it ALL OF THE WAYS.

 

*Cool Hint: You can add WHATEVER you want to these. I think next time I would add some nuts of some kind. Or berries. Or both. MMMMM. Endless. Cookie. Possibilities.

Enjoy guys!

Xo

Chicken Taco Chili

Baby, it’s cold outside. Like, friggin cold. Like, I don’t want to leave my house cold. Like, I’m just going to stay in the hot shower today, please inform my boss cold.

It’s love/hate with cold. I love cute coats and leggings with boots as much as the next, well, every girl ever. But it just came so fast. No transition at all! Did anyone else feel that way?! IT SLEETED ON HALLOWEEN. That’s just rude.

And with the cold came… THE colds. The “is this the flu? Am I dying?” colds. I had it for a solid two weeks. Mike has had it for a few days now. Our nightstands are covered in cold medicine and decongestants. We pop zinc like we pop gum. Oh, good times.

But you know what makes it all okay? Chicken taco chili.

I got this wonderful idea from Gina from Skinnytaste. I have actually been making it for a while now, but it has saved us this week so I figured it was time to share with you all! So because I make it all of the time, I winged it. I may be missing a few things she uses, but it always tastes amazing. This time it was amazing. I think you’d have to add in something really weird and gross for this to NOT taste amazing.

It kept us warm. It kept us spicy. It kept the nasal passages clear while eating it. I’ll take that tasty 15 minutes of breathing. Oh, yes I’ll take it.

You will need:

– 3 cooked and shredded chicken breasts (or a few cups of shredded rotisserie chicken)
– 1 cup of water
– 1 can diced tomatoes
– 1 small can tomato paste
– 1 can tomato sauce
– 1 small can of diced green chilis
– 1 can of black beans (drained)
– 1 bag frozen corn
– 1 chopped yellow onion
– 1 packet of taco seasoning
– 1 tablespoon of cumin
– 1 lime
– shredded cheese, sour cream/greek yogurt and cilantro for toppings

Combine all ingredients (minus lime and toppings) in your slow cooker on high for four hours.

Stir every hour or so.

Scoop about a cup out into a bowl. Squeeze a wedge of lime juice into the bowl. Add a dollop of sour cream and a little sprinkle of your favorite shredded cheese. Top it off with some cilantro and voila!

We eat on this all day every day. Mainly for lunch, but we’re both known to sneak a small bowl in the middle of the night.

It’s a tad spicy. Use less cumin if you’re not a fan of spice. But keep the spice if you’re cold and/or have a clogged nose. I don’t know about you all, but that’s about exactly what we need right now.

This chili is amazing fresh but even more amazing left over. It’s perfect for a packed lunch and it lasted us a full work week!

My goal is to make chili 3,000 ways this season. Chili is perfect. Chili is my spirit animal. Next up, buffalo chicken chili. Awwwww yeaaahhhh.

Two last things: 1) This chili is super good for you. It’s low in calories and fat. So don’t feel guilty. Ever. 2) Don’t accidentally drop some cumin on the floor and let your dog sniff it. Or do, because it’s the funniest thing ever.

Xo

Prosciutto Wrapped Jalapeño Poppers

Jeeeeeeeez.

This is the kind of snackatizer that makes me love watching my carbs. And yes, I make up words now. Call me Webster.

This more than makes up for the atrocious things people called low carb muffins I attempted to make twice last night. Can’t win em all.

The theme this week in my life is clearly HEAT. We finally had to turn our heat on, the election here is HEATED and everything on the menu this week is spicy as hell. This was all accidental. But I like it hot. Don’t we all? It’s a week into cold weather here and I’m already like, can we not? Can we just pause on the 60-70 degree weather for forever?

This will keep you warm. I assure you. I got this brilliant idea from the lovely and so hilarious Bev from Bev Cooks. I have made them with just plain old cream cheese and bacon but she put a twist on them that no one should ignore.

I’m as happy as a pig in a peach orchard that I made these babies. Sweet heat is all the yums.

You will need:
-8 jalapeños
-1 small block of cream cheese
-2 tablespoons of your favorite barbecue sauce
-8 slices of prosciutto

Pre-heat (there’s that heat again) the oven to 400 degrees.

Slice the jalapeños in half long ways. Gut them. Gut them good. Show no mercy. They’re already going to be spicy so trust me you do not want the guts and seeds.

Mix one block of softened cream cheese with 2 tablespoons of any barbecue sauce. Whip it. Into shape. Someone stop me, please.

Take a butter knife and scoop the mixture into the middle of each jalapeño piece. Or do it Bev’s really cool way that I used and put the mix in a baggy. Cut a little corner of the baggy off and squeeze for less mess. And more pretty.

Slice the prosciutto long ways into one inch slices. Use one long piece to wrap each jalapeño piece. It should be about the length of bacon. Maybe a little shorter.

The prosciutto sticks well to the surface of the jalapeño so I promise it’s easy!

Place your little heat babies on a non stick baking sheet. Put them in the oven for 10 minutes. Then turn the pan around in the oven to ensure they’re cooked evenly. Put them back in for another 10 minutes.

BAM. Snackatizers for everyone.

We’ll be eating on these all week when we want something to munch on instead of reaching for carb loaded snacks.

“Come on! Make it. Make it now. What are you waiting for!?” -Arnold Schwarzenegger

Xo

One Skillet Italian Chicken

Did I ever tell you all that when I was younger, I wished so badly I was italian? Pasta was all I was good at cooking, I have blackish hair, I loved the accents and I thought the country was beautiful. I had to be part italian, right? No. Not at all. Turns out I’m Irish and German. BOORRRRRINGGG. Just kidding. Didn’t everyone go through an “I wish I was italian” phase? Before the Jersey Shore? No? Great, I’m a weirdo.

I used to ONLY be able to cook pasta dishes. I could make ANYTHING into pasta form. And make it delicious. But there’s so much more to italian cooking. And there’s way healthier options! Especially for someone trying to lose weight. Womp womp. BUT WAIT. This doesn’t taste healthy. Or boring. Or womp womp. No no. Quite the opposite! The flavors in this dish pop like WHOA. It’s hearty, rich and loaded with good for you stuff. It’s perfect for two people. It’s perfect for dinner. It’s perfect for packed lunches the next day. It’s perfect if you want to try and convince people you are Italian. I won’t tell.

You will need:
-2 large chicken breasts (or 3 small) cut into strips
-1 jar of sundried tomatoes
-1 can of roasted tomatoes
-1 can of artichoke hearts
-1 zucchini squash, cut into rounds
-1/2 cup of chopped yellow onion
-3 garlic cloves
-1 tablespoon of italian seasoning
-2 tablespoons of olive oil
-2 tablespoons of balsamic vinegar

In an oven safe skillet (we used a cast iron skillet), put in one tablespoon of olive oil over medium/high heat. Add chicken strips. Brown on one side for 7-8 minutes. Flip over and cook for another 5-6 minutes.

Scoop out the chicken and set aside on a plate.

Add in onion, the chopped zucchini and the garlic. Add your last tablespoon of olive oil. Cook until soft, about 5-8 minutes. Add in both tomatoes and artichoke hearts. Drain all of them before putting into the skillet. Cook for another 3-5 minutes.

Add the chicken back in. At this time, stir in your two tablespoons of balsamic vinegar! Put skillet in the oven on 425 for 5-7 minutes, until fragrant as hell and bubbly. Sprinkle the italian seasoning on top! Voila!

Does your house smell like a cottage on a hill overlooking a vineyard and olive oil presses? Mine sure did.

I got mike’s seal of approval. And my own, of course. This is a meal fit for italian royalty. Do yourself a favor and make this now. One skillet gourmet italian? I mean, what more could you want? And low carb/gluten free/loaded with veggies and good for you fat to boot.

Enjoy guys!

Xo

Chicken Tortilla Chili (low carb)

Happy Monday! (Womp womp)

But, at least I have this delicious chili recipe!!! Right?!? Right?…..

Oh my gosh and it is so perfect for a cold night like tonight. And for windy fall lunches. Mmm. Fall.

So grab your ingredients, a blanket then enjoy while watching Gilmore Girls non stop on Netflix. Isn’t everyone doing this? Oh, just me? Okay then watch whatever you want!

You will need:
-4 cups of chicken broth (usually one large box at Trader Joe’s equals 4 cups)
-1 pound of boneless, skinless chicken breasts (cooked and shredded)
-1 can of roasted diced tomatoes
-2 small cans of diced green chilis
-1 can of white beans
-1 jalapeño gutted and cut up (we omit seeds to keep down on spice)
-1 cup of frozen onion (or freshly chopped onion)
-1 chopped red pepper
-1/2 cup heavy whipping cream
-1/2 cup of sour cream
-1 tablespoon of garlic paste
-2 tablespoons of cumin
-2 tablespoons of your favorite mexican hot sauce
-1 teaspoon each of salt and pepper
-1 like for squeezing and garnishing
-Shredded cheese and cilantro for topping, if so desired. (Who doesn’t desire those things? Give me all of the cheese and cilantro.)

Get that slow cooker going on high for four hours.

Add in all ingredients (except chicken if it hasn’t been cooked!)

Stir it all up nice.

You can cheat and use rotisserie chicken if you are short on time and/or are lazy. No judgment here!

If you’re cooking your chicken, lay the thawed chicken breasts out on a greased baking pan.

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees.

Massage chicken with garlic salt and cumin.

Bake for 30-40 minutes, depending on how thick your chicken breasts are! Make sure there is no pink inside!

Shred up the chicken and add to your chili!

Cook for 3-4 hours on high.

Demolish immediately or store in an airtight container in the fridge to have a deliciously spicy and hearty lunch every day! So perfect.

This is such a healthy, low carb, extremely low sugar meal. It’s perfect for us. And it will be perfect for you.

This is really hard to mess up, so if you want to add anything it will be delicious. If you aren’t worried about carbs, hell, add two more cans of white beans. Or use fat free sour cream. It’s totally customizable. This is just what was absolutely perfect and delicious for us!

I hope you enjoy this as much as we did.

Go ahead and top it with some cilantro and a squeeze of lime and eat up. I won’t judge you if you add a cup of cheese to your bowl and watch 7 episodes in a row of Gilmore Girls while eating.

Xo